My first time...

...wearing a hearing aid that is. What on earth were you thinking of, you dirty minded people?? ;-P

Of course I knew my hearing was getting worse. No surprise there. Even though I was prepared for it, it came as a shock. For a few years I had gotten used to being told my hearing was getting worse, but still in the 'normal' range. Then, suddenly, around Christimas, I was told I needed a hearing aid and I'm classed as hearing impaired.

I cried that day. I felt as if my world was falling apart. I had listened in shock as the doctor told me what was wrong with me ears - that the little bones by the eardrums are calcing up, stopping sound from passing through. So I knew what was causing the problem - surely they could fix it?

They could. But with a huge risk - it could go great and I could revert back to my hearing life, or it could go wrong and I could go completely deaf. I was faced with the decision - risk it, or accept my new life. I chose the later.

And I don't regret it. Yes, it was a shock and I was upset at now being classed as disabled. But upon getting my hearing aid, I was thrilled. Suddenly I could hear things, things I didn't know I was missing. I could hear birds. I hadn't realised how quiet my life had become, until I put in my hearing aid. I could hear my parents talking. I could hear lectures. It was amazing.

Pretty soon, I was no longer upset, but excited. When I saw my flatmate L. after Christmas, I practically jumped up and down in excitment showing her my hearing aid and exclaiming I can now hear things and she won't have to shout anymore. It was great.

Though, as I said in my first post, it doesn't come without its issues.

Since then, I've had quite a few hearing aids. Each time I go for a hearing test, my hearing has worsened, and so I either get new hearing aids or the ones I have get adjusted. I no longer get so excited about getting new hearing aids, nor am I as upset. My 'disability' has become a part of me. It doesn't define me, it is not all I am. But it is a part of me. And you know what? I'm proud of being deaf.

I'm learning so much about the deaf culture, language and community. My eyes have been opened. I have learnt a lot, things I wouldn't have learnt had I not started losing my hearing.

But... I do smile everytime my hearing aids get adjusted, and I can once again hear birds singing. It's a beautiful sound - don't take it for granted, because it might not always be there. So for me, while I still can, I will enjoy it. I hope you will as well.